December 2007 Archives
In nearly four years, I've never seen this happen before in my neighborhood - Edna has been a homeless street person for many years, existing from begging & handouts and sleeping on the sidewalks after dark.
The first few days I was in Manila, I remember passing her & seeing something completely different about her - she was clean and her clothes even looked freshly washed...I noticed her hair was combed...and I noticed she was washing dishes at a small back alley coffee shop that also served a little food to locals.
Then it all hit me: SHES WORKING!
I had to confirm it myself, so I went over to her and she told me YES, she's found a little job, and it pays her P70 (70 Pesos) a day - about $1.65USD.
I was elated!!
I held her hand and told her a few times "I'm SO proud of you; you're working now" "I'm so happy for you; Good Job..." etc.
A true Holiday Miracle.
PJAMES
Happy Holidays Everyone - be good to one another.PJAMES
December 4, 2007: in flight on Cathay Pacific's Airbus Industrie 330-300
What a great cause: It's actually a small envelope at each seat, for passengers wanting to deposit their spare change, so unicef can feed & help educate the needy...and it only asks for spare coins, and you can hand it off to any flight attendant.
Kudos to Hong Kong martial arts movie star Jackie Chan for doing the promotional in flight video trailer for Cathay Pacific's partnership aiding unicef.
Bravo.
November 25, 2007: Rosa & her biological Mother photographed streetside at 4:29am
On Nov.25, 2007 at just after 4am in the morning on the street, Rosa & Edison took me to the corner to meet their biological Mother for the first time, who's name I didn't even care to know.
I'd always known Rosa was raised by her Auntie Josie since she was 1yr. old, and I wasn't told any of the circumstances of those issues - but now we're here and Rosa's 13yrs. old now, and her Mama is the one responsible for bringing her kids into Metro Manila every night around 8pm until 4am; teaching them to beg by 'selling' flowers to tourists outside a tough girlie bar.
She was very shy & quiet, but smiling...and I was soft spoken and respectful.
Putting it mildly, I don't like this woman - age 35, able-bodied and won't, can't or doesn't care about finding work, so her kids can be home asleep at night, as is proper.
I've been in Rosa's abandoned shelter when she was living with Tito Willie & Auntie Josie, sat & ate with them, spent time with them, and watched nightly as Josie gathered the kids around before bed time to read from the Holy Bible.
Even though they were just this side of destitute in that dark shelter, it seemed all good then.
I'm outraged now - I don't know where this goes from here, although all the scenarios I can think of, go from bad to worse.
Thanks for reading today,
PJAMES
Shooting Notes:
again, I'm outside shooting available light past 4am, which means having to shoot ISO800 (inducing a bit of digital noise into the file) and a very slow hand held shutter speed, so some files are keepers and some are not.
With spontaneous street shooting, it can be hit or miss, especially in available light.
Dec.18, 2007: on the pBase.com Photographers Homepage
Actually, many photographers make it onto the pBase homepage daily - it felt good to see my favorite image (Lisa's portrait from Cebu) there yesterday evening - I was checking back after a glitch in their thumbnail image generator affected some of my & other photographers images (it was corrected quickly)
FYI: the pBase.com digital magazine issue #11 is out now and features some great photographers.
http://i2.pbase.com/o1/mag/pbase_magazine_vol11_oct2007.pdf
...I've never been featured there in the magazine, so if any of you would like to drop the editor a line if you think my pBase images (which also feature many Project Rice images of course) are good & important enough to be showcased there - please do, and Thank You in advance!
pBase.com/pauljames
Contact pBase.com Magazine editor Arjun Roychowdhury
http://www.pbase.com/arjunrc
November 25, 2007: Manila Philippines - Rosa & Edison photographed on the street at 3:51am, 'selling' flowers at their Mama's behest.
Olympus E-1, Olympus Zuiko 14-54mm f/2.8-3.5 Digital: 1/8s f/2.8 at 14.0mm iso800
The next night I set out at 3:45am to see if I could find Rosa, begging with Edison on the streets.
Manila's not a place you want to roam around in at that particular time - I have a saying when I'm there:
"Freaks Come Out at Night"
...and it's true - Manila's a more dangerous place at that hour, and I was careful to watch my 6, but I had to find them...and I did.
As I walked down the alley way to my favorite local 24hr. coffee shop (I can get coffee there for P10 a cup, and can make it as strong as I like, and I do like strong coffee) I saw Edison coming up the street, telling me Rosa was with him.
I got to the end of the street, turned the corner and she saw me, smiled & called out to me - but hesitated, as though she didn't know how I was going to react seeing her out at this hour.
She always knew I was not pleased to find her out past her previous 10pm bedtime - so she was testing me to see if I would be upset seeing her there (I was, but didn't let her know that immediately)
I motioned to her to come over to us & she ran over with hugs, as I hadn't seen her since April 2007 when she burned her hands with scalding water & I took her to the local medical clinic.
We sat down with Edison at a small table outside a local eatery - it was 3:51AM.
...what the HELL was she doing out at that hour, I thought.
..I saw the flowers she was holding in her hands, and again I bit my lip....she had never, ever begged before.
That killed me - I've fed her & her Family, taught her English, explained why she should stay in school & study, and tried to set a good example for her...and she started texting me "Papa PJ" last year while I was in the USA...
It was just good to see the kids again, even though I was upset at finding them streetside just shy of 4am.
PJAMES
Shooting Notes:
Outside at 3:51am its only available light & that means SLOW shutter speeds, sometimes VERY slow.
But the image also has a 3D depth of field quality to it, drawing you into the street at night; I like that.
This was 1/8th of a second and at that speed it's impossible to shoot daily life with moving people and not get 'movement' inside the image - but here the blacks & greys are interesting, as you can tell it's outside, lit by street lamps, and Rosa is always animated when we're out & about, so she shows movement, but that's the reality of the photograph - I don't try to hide that fact; it's what keeps my images real, and not contrived.
November 23, 2007: Manila Philippines - 11 year old Edison is roaming the streets at 12:29AM
Olympus E-1, Olympus Zuiko 14-54mm f/2.8-3.5 Digital: 1/30s f/2.8 at 14.0mm iso800
Go back to the posts on Rosa & Edison from November 27, 2007.
I went through that days files and remembered that on Nov.23rd. at 12:29am I went out to get a soda from the corner 7-11 as I sometimes do when I can't sleep there, and felt a presence on my 6, as I began to cross the street.
That's what we call a 'pre-incident indicator' (as we say in the business) and in Metro Manila while crossing the street with the big camera, you need to pay attention to that sense IMMEDIATELY.
It was Edison who swooped out from in back of me, on my right hand side as I started to spin around (I shot the top frame 'from the hip' while moving) I was told his biological Mother was taking the kids down here at night, to "sell" cheap flowers to foreigners who frequent a notorious girlie bar here....otherwise known as BEGGING.
I asked him what adult was with him, and where Rosa was - he told me that Auntie Josie was with them, down the street, and that they were indeed 'selling flowers', but Rosa was in Pasay City (where they had to move to) asleep.
I bit my lip and spit out a low "Edison - what the HELL are you doing out here after midnight...???" and asked them both if they'd like to come have a meal at the cheap coffee shop I go to down the street, and I got them both a good meal there.
In hindsight, I think Edison's Mother was there somewhere, maybe hiding - and was afraid of meeting me on such short notice.
I'm sure someone told her how pissed off I was, that Rosa & Edison - 2 formerly homeless children who I'd known for almost 4 years - kids I spent time with; taught, fed & clothed them as best I could - were put out (Pimped Out) to beg on the streets.
I wanted to meet their Mama - I wanted to see if Mama was old & decrepit, maybe handicapped & not able to work, etc.
I was giving them the benefit of the doubt.
Good Sunday Evening to you all,
PJAMES
The story & audio here, from the Morning Edition program on Dec.13, 2007
The story caught my eye, as it featured a photograph of a pregnant Filipina walking in Manila, and it reminded me of Mama Myrna (Jayveena's Mother) who's 8 months pregnant; living in the same abandoned shelter as Anna's Family.
Nov.28, 2007: Manila Philippines - Women are the backbone of the Family:
Myrna and Anna's Mother Tess sort clothes on wash day, and some clothes from our buying trip for the kids earlier that day, at Divisoria Market.
Olympus E-1, Olympus Zuiko 14-54mm f/2.8-3.5 Digital: 1/15s f/2.8 at 14.0mm iso1600
This was just a 'daily life as I see it' grabshot, as I don't set up my photography ahead of time, and I absolutely do not like to do flash photography in low light either, as that tends to make my images too sterile & clean.
Flash photography would also be very distracting to the household, and that's another reason I don't use it, as I spend a good part of my day with them in places like this, interacting with the Family and just doing normal things with them (breakfast, dinner, watching TV, playing with the kids, etc), and I've always been respectful enough not to start popping off flashes every time I wanted to capture an image.
Hence my available light images look the way they do (raw & spontaneous/not technically perfect, hand-held at slower shutter speeds in low light) when reflecting daily life.
Thanks for reading today,
PJAMES
Weather: Manila, Philippines
at 11:00 pm PHT
Haze, 76ºF
Hi: 87 Lo: 77 Saturday December 15,2007
November 23, 2007: Manila Philippines - 4:08pm
Olympus E-1, Olympus Zuiko 14-54mm f/2.8-3.5 Digital: 1/500s f/3.5 at 54.0mm iso100
...the colors & textures of the rough wall behind her, the old tattered shirt she wears and can not keep clean, all seem to define who she is, and yet this is not literally true - she's a regular child deep down, it's not her fault she's so poor.
PJAMES
Nov.23, 2007 & Nov.21, 2006: Manila Philippines
Nov.23, 2007: Olympus E-1, Olympus Zuiko 14-54mm f/2.8-3.5 Digital: 1/500s f/3.5 at 54.0mm iso100
Nov.21, 2006: Olympus E-1, Olympus Zuiko 14-54mm f/2.8-3.5 Digital: 1/500s f/3.5 at 50.0mm iso400
...almost a year to the day between these 2 images taken of this homeless child whose name I do not know - my immediate thoughts are that she does not look in as good a condition in 2007 as she did in 2006 in the bottom image, where I was sitting quietly in a local back alley coffee shop and noticed her fidgeting with her hand; her body language suggesting she wanted food, so I asked the counter girl to bring her a plate of whatever she liked, as she would not come sit at my table.
I've never seen an adult with this child; I don't know if there's anyone looking after her, and she's most likely on her own.
She still won't look me in the eye most times, and when I passed her last month in the top image I gave her all the raisin bread I was carrying from 7-11, and all the coins in my pocket.
The song 'Crystal ball' by Keane was playing in my head all the time I was in Manila, and everywhere I looked that week I was constantly being disappointed; feeling vulnerable & sad when I saw the kids on the streets, the lyric:
"..oh crystal ball/crystal ball, save us all - tell me life is beautiful..."
"...I don't know where I am, and I don't really care.....I look myself in the eye, there's no one there..."
"...I fall upon the earth, I call upon the air....but all I get is the same old vacant stare..."
I was worried about my Father back in the USA - I was worried about the familiar faces I was seeing who were no better off then last year; it all made me feel pretty helpless in many ways...
A Philippine amateur songwriter has apparently decided that my copyrighted Project Rice photography is free for the taking (without asking me for permission, without licensing, etc.) and free to incorporate my images into his own music video?
I know it's really tongue-in-cheek amateur project and he didn't set out to upset anyone, etc.....but baby you have to ASK before you go ahead & take content belonging to others that you want to use:)
..initially I was pissed, but there's really nothing to be pissed about, now that I've expressed that people use common courtesy, manners & abide by copyright laws when they want to do this sort of thing.
I received an email from this guy informing me after the fact, that he went ahead & used my images in his music video w/out my permission, and just went ahead & posted it on YOUTUBE.com
Thankfully he's not a professional singer or video editor, and the slide show is a grainy mess of low resolution images.
On the other hand, since my images came out so poorly displayed, I initially was pissed off as I work very hard on creating high quality JPEG content in Photoshop, as any good pro photographer would do - and this is surely not at all representative of my work.
J.C. Manlapat, please ask permission ahead of time when you decide you wish to use other peoples intellectual property, ok?
Thanks Brother!
PJAMES
Getting back to Philippines & need Urgent help, actually.
I've been on the phone with Cathay Pacific's reservation center in New York several times today, asking for special dispensation on my return airfare - I was told by other travel writer friends of mine in Philippines to ask for a "bereavement fare", which is typically 50pct. off the price of your previous airfare.
Basically I left the USA on Nov.20th with a 4 month ticket, returning March 25, 2008, and had to return on an emergency basis to the USA after a few days in Philippines, due to the death of my Father...now I need to get back to Philippines and am hitting a wall in terms of finding someone at Cathay Pacific to help me ie. offering me a deeply discounted airfare to get back, or working some sort of deal.
They flat out told me a firm "NO".
Cathay Pacific told me they do not offer a bereavement fare, and now they want me to purchase ANOTHER airfare from scratch, if I need to fly back........YES, I need to be back asap!
Cathay Pacific wanted to sell me a $2,000USD airfare from JFK to Cebu Philippines.....WAT????????
For me, that's impossible - the best airfare deals are currently at about $1,500USD including taxes/fees, and it's just impossible after buying my original Nov.2007 airfare which I just burned through.
I need a Supervisor in Management there, to make a management decision based on the emergency I encountered - and was not allowed to speak to a Supervisor at all.
Cathay Pacific suggested I contact Asia Miles Frequent Flyer program (I'm a member) and offer them my 34,400mi. in my acct. basically equal to 1/2 a r/t airfare (basically JFK to MNL) then look into buying a 1-way ticket MNL to JFK for around $750+taxes or so.
I contacted Asia Miles based in Hong Kong, and it gets better:
1. the female associate couldn't understand my English accent, and couldn't get past it.
2. I asked for a Supervisor - she told me there was no Supervisor there who could speak with me.
3. I asked for the Asia Miles email address, to write out my issue - she said there was no address for Asia Miles.
4. I asked her to give me to another agent there - she said there was no way for her to transfer my call to someone else there.
At that point I hung up the phone.
If anyone reading this, or anyone knowing a good travel agent with experience in matters like this can help me figure out a remedy, please email me at: team@projectrice.org
Thanks for reading today,
PJAMES
I hadn't slept at all the night before dad's Funeral; I came downstairs at 6:45am and began to talk to my sister Karen in a very low, direct voice - I was not upset at her, but I was letting her know that I was going to handle Dad's appearance issue with the Funeral Director personally within the hour, and she knew I was going to be verbally forcefull, alarmingly direct, and didn't want things to have the chance to go beyond that.
I spoke low & clear (I can not recall in recent memory when I was that angry and used that tone of voice to anyone), and told my sister that I was going down to the Funeral Home in an hour, and that I was going to put Bill my security person on the front door, and that place would go into 'lockdown' - no one would be let inside until the Funeral Director made my Father's appearance acceptable.
(Bill is a very good friend, and was a part of my Security crew in the early 90's, and is currently a Master SGT. in the National Guard, a Veteran of 2 Tours of Duty in Iraq)
I told my sister "...I don't care if he has to use an electric car buffer to get that shit off Dad's face - I don't give a shit if Limos & people are waiting - he's on MY time clock & WE are paying the bill here - so that place is CLOSED until he corrects this fuck up, and I will personally supervise this happens asap..."
The anger was eating me up inside, and my sister saw that (she is SO much smarter then I am) so she decided to avoid the confrontation & told me she would go ahead of me and make it happen, as I wished.
Thank you Karen for protecting your older brother - she went ahead of me and I didn't need to make trouble for anyone; I sincerely didn't want to.
Later at the Funeral Home they did what they could; I stayed angry as not all that morbid paint-like goop was able to be removed from my Father's face, and that anger continued to eat me up inside for the next 2 days.
I have since let all that anger go away; what's done is done and I can do nothing about it now, but I will not let that stand in the way of my grief, and it has been doing that since the Wake - so enough is enough; it's all gone now.
I take the blame for all that myself, as I wasn't able to communicate clearly enough to the Funeral Home, since I'd just woken up after a 20hr. flight back to the USA - it's just that our Family had dealt with this vendor before with satisfactory results, and I did not think we'd have any problems this time.
People, when it's time to deal with vendors in the Funeral business, please be CRYSTAL CLEAR with them about your requirements; schedule a meeting and speak slowly & clearly to them about what you need, and moreover, what is not acceptable to you.
If you are not in the correct mindset to speak to them, bring a close Family friend or spokesperson who can act on your behalf - tell them what you want & have them repeat your requests back to you, so there is no confusion.
....put it writing for them if you feel you need to, and let them know that since you are paying the bill, you may choose to stop in during the work to supervise, and you WILL be accommodated in this regard, or you will simply choose another vendor.
I accepted the American Flag from the 2 young enlisted men who stood by Dad's casket, who told me: "...On behalf of a grateful Nation..."
Upon receiving the Flag, I looked that young man in the eye and said "Thank You, Soldier...GO NAVY"...and I smiled a little smile.
I stayed behind at graveside after the limos had left with my Family - I didn't tell anyone about my plans and my sister went ahead to the planned gathering at a local restaurant, but she did send a car for me a little while later - I wanted to stay with the casket until it was in the ground, and I did.
I looked after my Father until right to the very end - I was delayed in getting back from Philippines and missed him when he died (I'm dealing with trying to reconsile that now), so I wanted to be there at the cemetary with him after everyone had left.
Am I my Father's Keeper?
...actually, yes I am.
...and I said so during his Eulogy.
I am my Father's Keeper, I am my Brothers Keeper (he died in 1983) and I am my Mother's Keeper (Mom died in 2003 & I was in Philippines for my first trip there within 4 weeks after her passing)
I'm not angry anymore; just grieving...and I'll be ok.
Thank you for reading today, and on behalf of my Family, Thank You for all your kind and encouraging emails.
God Bless.
PJAMES
November 15, 2007
One of the last photographs I took of my Father, as his grandson Justin Sheppard's him into my sisters new house; we had just arrived in South Carolina.
I love this image, as I do not like to do flash photography, and I got lucky here at 1/13th of a second - everything seems to show blur & movement, and my Father's face is really the only thing that's sharp, so I managed a really good capture.
Olympus E-1, Olympus Zuiko 14-54mm f/2.8-3.5 Digital: 1/13s f/2.8 at 14.0mm iso400
...I call Cathay Pacific later this morning about getting a special berievement fare back to the Philippines, within the next few days.
Posting from Hong Kong Int'l Airport
My sister called my cell last night at 8:30pm in Cebu Philippines - I knew what she was going to say.
Dad passed away Dec.3, 2007 at 4:30am - I didn't make it back in time.
I just got re-ticketed yesterday at Cathay Pacific's offices in Cebu City; they got me a flight out at 12:40pm earlier today, and I'm connecting here in HK at 7pm local time.
It was a long night last night, and a hectic day today - and I'll be writing more as soon as I get the chance.
I miss my Father terribly now...
PJAMES
Update Dec.5, 2007
I've made it back to the USA; we landed at 9pm and I got back to the house around 2:30am earlier this morning to find my sister Karen & her boys already there, and she heard me walking around at 5am so we chatted for a while - she's running normal-to-crying; I'm ok so far, considering. (I've just been dealing with luggage & airports, flights, etc. so nothings really hit me yet)
I'm a bit hammered with jet lag, so I wasn't up at 8am when she went to the Funeral Home to finalize arrangements, but at 5pm I did go down there to see my Father, to make sure everything was appropriate, appearance wise.
I guess prior to a Wake, they don't normally want to accommodate Family members for viewing in an embalming room and I understand that - but I stopped in unannounced wanting to see Dad, and was told no twice (bad answer)
After politely insisting with a smile, I won.
Dad's ok and I'm glad I finally saw him - I spent some time with him and gave everything a last minute check, and then came home, set up the laptop and opened Photoshop.
I don't know what else to do now, so I go back to the computer and do what I know I do best.
Update: Dec.6, 2007
The Wake is today from 4pm-7pm and things here at the house are happening at 200mph, so I just want to be able to get through this day, and thanks to all the kind words & emails from my friends I think we'll all be ok, one way or another.
Update: Dec.7, 2007
The Funeral is today; the limo's pick us up in 1 hr.
Yesterday at the Wake was an absolute joke - I was SO profoundly upset at the fact that an excessive and unnecessary amount of make up was applied to my Fathers face - it was detectable from 10ft. away and looked like someone applied several coats of Sears House paint to his face - like several layers of pinkish, powdery, pancake-like paint was applied, with little skill.
If it's blatantly detectable from 10ft. away, then you are unskilled at what you do - and if you are profoundly lacking in that particular artistic skill in applying makeup, THEN YOU SHOULD NOT BE DOING IT, ESPECIALLY AFTER THE FAMILY'S ASKED YOU NOT TO DO IT!
IF THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH THE CONDITION OF THE DECEASED SKIN AND YOU ARE ASKED NOT TO USE MAKE UP, THAT MEANS "DO NOT - DO NOT USE MAKEUP"
I ended up apologizing or Dad's appearance, to my Family as they arrived - and I should not have had to apologize for my Father's appearance.
Although I went down to the Funeral Home the day before the wake to mention "Dad's skin looks fine the way it is; no makeup please" - I was let-lagged & tired when I went there, and I blame myself for not being able to communicate this to them in a more direct way, using the Queens English.
I ended up being so profoundly upset & disappointed; it completely & utterly ruined my day with Dad yesterday, and I will get get this unprofessional situation taken care of THIS AM, post-haste.....it's 7am now.
I also have not cried yet, or wigged out, or screamed into a bag yet, etc.
..The reality of things are only now beginning to hit me - and I can feel it coming.
I'm just venting...
Mom & Dad in 2002 at his 80th Birthday Celebration
Olympus D340R w/flash
Summer 2005 at 83 years of age:
All airline offices close for the weekends here in the Philippines, so I was not able to get any customer service assistance except from the airline counter in Lapu Lapu City, which is only open during the afternoons, when Int'l flights are happening.
I was at the Cathay Pacific offices in Cebu today at 9am, and I've been re-ticketed for tomorrow to fly back to the USA; I leave here at 12 noon.
My sister told me yesterday that Dad has now been moved to a Hospice, so I told her to try to tell him I'm running home as fast as I can.
I'll update again from Hong Kong's airport tomorrow, time pending.
From my Family to yours, THANK YOU to my friends who are emailing me with kind words and prayers - I love you all.
PJAMES
I'm currently in Cebu City Philippines - my sister has just sent 2 emails advising me my Father is back in ICU and his Priests have been called to his bedside; it's time for him.
I'm running to get a flight back to Manila, and a re-ticket back to the USA pending a seat availability, so say a prayer I can get a flight out of Manila soon - I don't want my Father to pass without me being there with him.
I have to suspend all new content from here until sometime after arriving back in the USA - thank you all for understanding, and I'll update things here as I have time from, in the USA
Please pray for my Father - I told my sister to tell him I'm rushing back, and to hang on.....and to not be afraid.
PJAMES
