My Father has died (UPDATED 12/5,6,7/2007)

Posting from Hong Kong Int'l Airport

My sister called my cell last night at 8:30pm in Cebu Philippines - I knew what she was going to say.

Dad passed away Dec.3, 2007 at 4:30am - I didn't make it back in time.

I just got re-ticketed yesterday at Cathay Pacific's offices in Cebu City; they got me a flight out at 12:40pm earlier today, and I'm connecting here in HK at 7pm local time.

It was a long night last night, and a hectic day today - and I'll be writing more as soon as I get the chance.

I miss my Father terribly now...
PJAMES

Update Dec.5, 2007

I've made it back to the USA; we landed at 9pm and I got back to the house around 2:30am earlier this morning to find my sister Karen & her boys already there, and she heard me walking around at 5am so we chatted for a while - she's running normal-to-crying; I'm ok so far, considering. (I've just been dealing with luggage & airports, flights, etc. so nothings really hit me yet)

I'm a bit hammered with jet lag, so I wasn't up at 8am when she went to the Funeral Home to finalize arrangements, but at 5pm I did go down there to see my Father, to make sure everything was appropriate, appearance wise.

I guess prior to a Wake, they don't normally want to accommodate Family members for viewing in an embalming room and I understand that - but I stopped in unannounced wanting to see Dad, and was told no twice (bad answer)

After politely insisting with a smile, I won.

Dad's ok and I'm glad I finally saw him - I spent some time with him and gave everything a last minute check, and then came home, set up the laptop and opened Photoshop.

I don't know what else to do now, so I go back to the computer and do what I know I do best.

Update: Dec.6, 2007

The Wake is today from 4pm-7pm and things here at the house are happening at 200mph, so I just want to be able to get through this day, and thanks to all the kind words & emails from my friends I think we'll all be ok, one way or another.

Update: Dec.7, 2007

The Funeral is today; the limo's pick us up in 1 hr.

Yesterday at the Wake was an absolute joke - I was SO profoundly upset at the fact that an excessive and unnecessary amount of make up was applied to my Fathers face - it was detectable from 10ft. away and looked like someone applied several coats of Sears House paint to his face - like several layers of pinkish, powdery, pancake-like paint was applied, with little skill.

If it's blatantly detectable from 10ft. away, then you are unskilled at what you do - and if you are profoundly lacking in that particular artistic skill in applying makeup, THEN YOU SHOULD NOT BE DOING IT, ESPECIALLY AFTER THE FAMILY'S ASKED YOU NOT TO DO IT!

IF THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH THE CONDITION OF THE DECEASED SKIN AND YOU ARE ASKED NOT TO USE MAKE UP, THAT MEANS "DO NOT - DO NOT USE MAKEUP"

I ended up apologizing or Dad's appearance, to my Family as they arrived - and I should not have had to apologize for my Father's appearance.

Although I went down to the Funeral Home the day before the wake to mention "Dad's skin looks fine the way it is; no makeup please" - I was let-lagged & tired when I went there, and I blame myself for not being able to communicate this to them in a more direct way, using the Queens English.

I ended up being so profoundly upset & disappointed; it completely & utterly ruined my day with Dad yesterday, and I will get get this unprofessional situation taken care of THIS AM, post-haste.....it's 7am now.

I also have not cried yet, or wigged out, or screamed into a bag yet, etc.
..The reality of things are only now beginning to hit me - and I can feel it coming.

I'm just venting...

Mom & Dad in 2002 at his 80th Birthday Celebration

Olympus D340R w/flash

Summer 2005 at 83 years of age: